Come on, People!

OK, so it has officially been a week since I started this blog.  If anything, it has been challenging and fun for me to keep an online journal of my thoughts.  However, as much as I truly appreciate you reading this blog, I don't want this site to be all about me!  I understand if you are uncomfortable with sharing personal feelings/thoughts, but I would encourage you all to post on here. :) I don't necessarily want just comments, but stories, thoughts, verses, anything that God has laid on your heart!  My desire is that this site will be a place where we, as Christians, can openly share with one another about what God is doing in our lives and teaching us!  And for those who are struggling, or who don't know Christ, then I pray that our messges will encourage and speak to those who need them!

So, to kick start this week, I'm going to take it slow.  I may have a devotional thought, or I might just post something that requires response :).  I know that for some you don't have the time to write a big long story, and for others, you may not know what to put, so to get the ball rolling, I'm just going to ask a simple question: What is your favorite Bible verse? And, if you feel so inclined, please share why.  I personally would love to read how God speaks so tenderly to you through His word. You never know who YOU might touch just by replying. :)

Now, no pressure, but my husband just unpacked a plethora of guns, and I wouldn't be opposed to good natured threats.  :)

I'll start. My favorite verse, in recent years, has become Isaiah 43:1-3.
¹ But now, this is what the LORD says—
   he who created you, Jacob,
   he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
   I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
² When you pass through the waters,
   I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
   they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
   you will not be burned;
   the flames will not set you ablaze.
³ For I am the LORD your God,
   the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;

This passage came about after Logan's tragic wreck, and has continued to stay with me during those difficult years, and the heartaches that have come.  I take hope in knowing and remembering that He has taken me and my family through fire safely before, and He will do it time and time again! Have a blessed Monday!

Guns, Dogs, and Blaze Orange

Today I did something I have never done before... wait for it.... I hunted.  Ok, I didn't actually shoot a bird, or even carry a gun, (I think you have to know how to use one in order to be an official hunter)but I did get up before the sun and tag along with a group of hunters. Yes, I finally gave in..the weather happened to be more to my liking, so I decided to give it a shot (no pun intended).

We began our morning at good ol Mickey D's, (for those of you who know me well, you know what a treat that was ha!), then we headed to our first field.  I have never seen so many crazy, wound up, beautiful dogs  in my life.  We had a crew of about 15 people and at least 20 dogs.  It was one of the most enjoyable, entertaining moments of my life.  There was little wind, the sky was clear, the weather was perfect, and I was surrounded by a gaggle of mammals completely consumed by their mission.  I must say, it was much better than I had anticipated.  At the end of the day, it wasn't too successful, a little too warm probably. But, I did get to see my dog point, and my hubby snagged one in the air, so I personally couldn't ask for much more (and I got in a LOT of walking:) ).

My point in all of this is to say that today I realized how truly blessed I am.  Looking back on my life just a few short years ago, I would have never dreamed that I would be walking around in blaze orange with a bunch of bird killers. Had I continued on my own path, I would never have gotten to experience the love of a new wonderful family, restored relationships with my own, an amazing, encouraging husband, a silly lovable dog, and the peace I now see daily.  God took this mess of a person, picked me up, forgave me,  and then dumped his love on me like I could never have imagined.  I am so glad today that I am in a place where I can see that, grasp it, and just purely enjoy it! Thank you God for your mercy, grace, and boundless love!

Today I would just ask you to take a moment to reflect, maybe even share, about what God has done with and in your own life.  I think it's important to never forget where we came from so we can truly appreciate what we have.  If you have never experienced that joy, than I pray that you would give Him a shot.  He can take your mess and turn it into something beautiful.  May we all bask in the glory of His power and love today, and take a moment to look at that clear blue sky all around us.

Surely not me, Lord!

Ok, so the past few posts have been pretty lovey..feel good stuff..encouragment. Well I don't think today will be, because what I read this morning hit me and will probably hit some of you as well.
James 1:13-17 talks about temptation and it states that God does not tempt us, that all temptation comes from within us. My Bible commentary pointed out that we often look for someone or something else to blame for our "not so Godly" actions instead of ourselves.  We might say "I couldn't help it, everybody's doing it, it was just a mistake, nobody's perfect, I didn't know it was wrong,..etc."Basically, we try to jusitfy our wrongdoings.  But, the Message version says "We have no one to blame but the leering, seducing flare up of our own lust." Yikes. I think that's pretty straightfoward.  It's not the million excuses I come up with, the real culprit is myself.  James goes on to describe how lust (not just sexual lust, but selfish, unholy actions, etc.) lead to sin, which lead to death.  If we continue giving into those temptations, eventually they will consume us and we will be headed down the wrong path...the path to death.

Well this is a pretty heavy passage, and I started praying "Well God, I don't have a problem with this, I'm not tempted to have an affair, or to drink my life away, or to kill someone" (my mind automatically went to the "big" no nos) But then I got hit with this:

"But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God-- having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them."

-2 Timothy 3:1-5

Whoa. I may not be haunted by my past demons, but I sure do fall into a number of these patterns.  How often do I chose to be selfish, ungrateful, and unforgiving? How often do I chose to let my pride control my actions? How often do I chose to gossip and slander fellow children of God?  And the self control? Now that's a big one, because if I could exercise self-control more, maybe I wouldn't be caught up in these other displeasing attitudes and actions. What was reinforced to me today is that I need to start choosing to take the higher road when I am tempted to carry out these lustful desires.  Who really benefits from these anyways? I sure don't, and I leave a string of hurt people, missed opportunities, and a restless spirit because of my own selfishness.

I'll leave you with this:

 

1 Corinthians 10:13  tells us that when we are tempted, God will provide us with a way out.  So from now on, I would challenge you, and myself to look for that way out. It doesn't say He'll provide an easy way out, but there is at least a crack to break through. Maybe we just need to start looking for that little light.

My Darkness

So today I finally got a job! Hooray! It was Elementary P.E. (enough said) and it started off with some spilled sour milk (gag), but that"s for another day. So I am a little late in typing out my blog for the day.  I actually had a really good day of reading material and reflecting on scripture, however I felt like I needed to talk about yesterday.  Now, just a little disclaimer: this is not to get sympathy, or to receive words of encouragement, or to throw a pity party. I just felt like with this blog I want to be completely honest with what I go through and how God moves. So here goes:

Yesterday just down right sucked.  I went to the "woman" doctor for a checkup, and although everything physically was fine, emotionally, I was not.  There are few things in my life that have just left me utterly broken, and yesterday was one of them.  As I watched tummy after tummy enter for their checkups, reality hit me hard.  I can honestly say that God has gone above and beyond to provide me with peace and understanding about this situation, but yesterday, it just crumbled.  I went home feeling completely helpless, hopeless, and just down right sad.  My heart ached for what could have been, and now at the long road ahead.  I say all of this to point out that even though I try to grow in my faith, and I try to be strong, sometimes, I just can't do it. These are the times when I realize just how much I truly need God, and yesterday, I just needed Him to hold me. I just wanted to ache.

I know that we all have felt that at some point in our lives, and no amount of comfort or words, or earthly hugs and tears can make the pain go away.  So today I hope this message brings you comfort in those sorrowful moments of life.  I read serveral verses that were comforting to me, but I would like to save those for a later date.  Today, I feel I need to share these beautiful words that spoke so perfectly to how I felt yesterday, and I take comfort in their message of hope to me. I hope you will top.
"Like a candle in the rain, I feel so helpless. Waiting for a flame to come, and light my darkness. But even in the rain, God burns with a flame, like 10,000 candles in my darkness. Even though I'm blinded Lord, and darkness covers me, I gladly put my trust, in what I cannot see. And when you shine Your light Oh Lord, darkness flees from thee, Never shall I fear, for Your light is guiding me. Your light is guiding me." (Words by:Paul Logan Clark)

Even in my darkest, heart wrenching moments, God's light shines through and leads me on. Love you all.

Mary: Oh What an Example!

First off, thank you mom, for viewing my blog multiple times to make it appear that more people had read it.  You're great at making me feel special :).  But in all seriousness, I was humbled by the responses and views that I did get from people. Thank you for encouraging me and for taking the time to read this! I'm still not sure exactly what I'm doing, or where this will go, but hopefully you will all use this to communicate your thoughts and feelings as well!  So today, no job again, this weather has put a real damper on sub jobs..maybe that's my hint to find a real job...eh I think I'll ignore that one a little longer. But anyways, so here I sit with my spoiled dog cozy and curled up next to me and time to kill. I had difficulty deciding what to put today because I read two different things that I thought might be good to share.  So, first off I apologize that I seem to be unable to make this brief (I'm sure when I have less time, the posts will be less), but for today here are some of my thoughts:

Mary
A couple years ago my dad gave me a book entitled "Tweleve Extraordinary Women" by John MacArhur.  It's about twelve different women in the Bible and their faithfulness.  I read it pretty faithfully at first, and then it was somehow misplaced from my reading pile (sorry dad). But today, I found where I had left off, and that was on Mary.  To be honest, there was a lot of information that kind of bogged me down, but overall it was very interesting.  In reflecting, I find it odd that we know very little about the mother of Jesus, our Savior. And yet, on the other hand, I dont' find it odd at all.  I think that Mary's life and activity weren't discussed often because her job was to sit back and be the stepping stone for God's amazing plan through His Son. However, I would like to know what that was like to be the mother of our Messiah.  What did she think? How did she discipline him? What was her attitude toward him? How did she feel knowing that someday the prophecies would come to fruition, and her precious child would be slain?  With the little we do know about her, we do know a few things:

1. She found favor with God. - This tells me that she was living right.  She was a good kid, and wanted to live her life according to her faith. Can you imagine finding favor with God? My heart leaps at the idea of this, that we can find favor with our Creator!

2. She accepted her calling. (Luke 1:38) This task put a lot of pressure on Mary because 1. She wasn't married, and 2. Now she's pregnant and Jospeh isn't the father (which is usually not ideal when your engaged).  Can you imagine the uncertinanty of this situation? But she chose to trust and obey anyways.

3. She tried a couple of times to tell Jesus what she wanted Him to do, but in the end stepped back and let Him be her Lord. Just like us (although we do it far more often), she thought she could have some say in His plans. (Mark 3:31-35, John 2:3) And he probably graciously smiled and was like "You have no idea, just let me do my thing!" (ok, maybe not exactly like that, but I picture Him with a knowing smile and a kind laugh sometimes yah know?)

4. She followed Him all her days. There are a couple times where she is mentioned being with the disciples, and to me, she was probably one of His biggest devotees. She chose to follow Him, knowing that heartache would be part of the job, which I'm sure was not always easy!

5. She experienced great loss.  She stood there at the foot of the cross and watched her precious child take on the sins of the world, and yet she didn't flee. There is no record of her screaming and flailing about at the injustice of it all, she just stood their gracefully as she witnessed the death of her own Son!

6. She was taken care of. On the cross Jesus called out to her and told John to behold his mother.  MacArthur pointed out that this was Jesus' way of providing a caregiver for her.  He recognized her tender relationship to himself, and reassured her in that moment, that although her job with Him was through, that she would not be left alone.
In reflecting on all of this, I think that although little is recorded about her, we know a lot about her character and the type of faith she had.  You may be saying, as I did to myself : Well she was the mother of Jesus, angels talked to her, she could endure all of this because she got to see Him firsthand.  I thought that too, but then I remembered that she was human too. Although we know the rest of the story, there were long periods where nothing happened in Jesus' life.  Mary had grown up on the Old Testament, and I'm sure knew of the prophecies, but I doubt that made it any easier for her to be able to trust and let go.  I was encouraged to know that someone even as close as Jesus' mother experienced life as we do, and yet she remained faithful til the end.  Oh how glorious to know that through it all He is moving, and working, and he provides for us still!  Have a blessed day!
P.S. I think that's enough for today, I'll save my other clip for later.

My Purpose

So, this morning I did not get a call to go in and sub today... it's a Monday, so no surprise.  Although I would like to be working a little more, I am enjoying the long mornings I have to spend reading, thinking, and journaling.  Every time I don't get a call, I have every intention of getting up early and using my day to accomplish things..the cluttered basement, my excessive closet, a trip to the dog park, that smell in our trash can...but alas here I sit going on my second hour of being awake with stil nothing accomplished.  Well, I guess I haven't not accomplished something, I spent 30+ minutes trying to figure out this blog site and I still don't know if it's going to work.  However, in all my laziness these past few weeks, I have spent more time with my heavenly Father than I have consistently in probably the sum of my life.  There are days where I look forward to these quiet moments, and there are days when I want to get going with my day...but you can see how well that works out for me.  For I find on the days that I want to have plans, God has others for me, and on the days I am ready to dig in, I have more time for my plans. Whichever way I blow these days, I am learning one thing: I need that time with God, even when I want to be selfish.  I am finding that if I don't spend the time with him, my attitude is off, my heart is heavy, and I am left to my own resources to conquer the day...which usually doesn't turn out so well.

Over the past few months, I have felt that God is calling me to get the word out about what He is showing me and doing in my life.  My heart and prayer is for everyone who reads this blog (so probably just my mother) that you will develop, stregthen, or be encouraged by this same relationship in your own life.  My desire is that we will all experience God's amazing grace, but even more importantly, that we will take that grace and learn how to extend it to others.  I think that our world is a scary place, and everywhere you look there is corruption. But, I have seen, and I believe that God is still alive and well, and that we as Christians need to really start living as we are called.  I am by no means close to being that kind of Christian, but I know I want to try and I want to learn and grow, and I hope that you will too.  So having said all of this, I would encourage you to repsond to these posts, to look at my pages and comment, but mostly to use this space as a spot to encourage each other and show that there is hope in this dark world.  I love you all my fellow bloggers (mom..and maybe my dad :) ... Thank you for taking the time to stop by, I hope it's worth it!

My devotional thought for the day:

Ecclesiastes 11:5-6
5Just as you cannot understand the path of the wind or the mystery of a tiny baby growing in its mother's womb, so you cannot understand the activity of God, who does all things. 6 Plant your seed in the morning and keep busy all afternoon, for you do not know if profit will come from one activity or another- or maybe both.
We discussed this verse in Sunday school yesterday, and I love what is says and what we can take away from it! First off, in verse 5, it talks about putting our trust in God.  In recent weeks, Clinton and I have experienced some challenging circumstances, and so have some of our other family members, and at times it's been difficult to trust that God is in control.  However, this verse encourages us to trust.  We don't know why our baby was taken, or why things aren't working out for some of our family members, but this verse tells us that we can't understand God's activity, but we need to trust that he is in control.  He makes the wind blow and those tiny babies form!  Even though our human minds can't grasp why things happen, faith is believing that God knows and that He has a plan, and someday we will hopefully understand and see. But in the meantime, I think we move on to our second verse here, verse 6.

What I love about this verse is that it says you need to keep busy all day and that you don't know if profit will come from one activity or another.  We aren't told to be faithful and work hard at our job only, or in our family only, no, we are told to keep busy in all the activities we do.  We don't know if that conversation, or that relationship, or even our everyday boring stuff is going to be a blessing or a seed for someone else.  Therefore, since we cannot understand God's activities, we need to be making sure that we are living in a way that keeps us open for those activities to be accomplished.  As Christians, we should live every aspect of our lives according to His word, and be aware of our attitudes, actions, and words.  Sometimes we may get to experience that joy of seeing fruit from our faithfulness, and I get so excited thinking about when those moments might come! But other times, we may never see how our actions affected someone. However, we need to trust and be aware, that we are here for a purpose and that God will move in us if we let Him. Let's be open to how God can use us, it could be as simple as a friendly hello.
May the love of God fill your heart today, and may you pass that love on to someone else.