Darn that Blessed Be Song

I have a love/hate relationship with the song "Blessed be Your Name." You know "blessed be the name of the Lord, blessed be your name..." I'm sure you can Youtube it if its not ringing a bell.  However, if you've been in the church long enough, or listened to Christian radio long enough, to me, it's outplayed it welcome. It's cycles through worship services, radio, and has probably been sung at every chruch conference, retreat, and special speaker I've attended. Not that what its says isn't good, but sometimes songs get run into the ground.

Here's my gig with the song. Not long after Logan's wreck, my mother (sorry sisters I don't remember if you attended) and I went to a ladies brunch at our church. Our speaker for the day was the sister of one of the dear members of the church. She had just recently experienced the unimaginable.  While driving, she and her family were in a horrible car wreck.  She was the only survivor. The wreck claimed the lives of not only her beloved husband, but all of her children.  Needless to say, her message struck close to home, as we, my mother and I, sat reeling from the brokeness of our own tragic situation.  But here's where the song comes in. Towards the end of her heartbreaking testimony, she began telling of how God used the song "Blessed be Your Name" to minister to her heart. And as she began to recall her encounter with God and this song, she began to sing it.. acapella..voice raised in tenderness...heart overflowing with pain..as she praised God. "When the darkness closes in Lord, still I will say Blessed be your name...You give and take away, my heart will CHOOSE to say.. Lord blessed be your name."

I can't even type without tears welling in my eyes. To this day everytime I hear that song I am reminded of that moment. When that precious, broken woman, who had virtually lost everything we hold dear, chose to praise God in the midst of her pain. So maybe that's my problem with the song, not that it's overplayed, but that the words are so hard to swallow.

Thursday was a rough day for me. My special friends had been particurally challenging, and to top it all off..sorry for my TMI.. but in the midst of it all my "lady issues" decided to pay me a visit.  Now, I have been so thankful, after all my body has been through that it is working right again. And, for the most part, I have been too busy to put much thought into the fact that this monthly visist means no baby. But Thursday was rough.  In the past 2 weeks, I have been around so many babies and pregnant women that I could scream. Not to mention I go to a classroom full of, albeit terrors, but adorable terrors, that fuel my desire.  So Thursday meant not only mean no baby, but now we have to start ALL OVER again.

So, as I'm throwing myself a pity party about my day and my situation, and I'm extra hormonal and emotional, and the last thing I want to do is try to be happy, that evening I had planned to travel to Garden with my mother-in-law to hear Chondra Pierce (a Christian comedian). So we get there and I am seated by none other than one of our young friends who is in the prime of her first pregnancy. Let's just pour a little more salt on my wounds. Well (I'm getting to my points, hang in there with me) what do you know, but before Chondra, Pocket Full of Rocks was leading the worship, and guess what song they started singing?  Yup. Do I need to say more?  It was all I could muster to not be a blubbering mess. It was like God was reaching down to me at that very moment saying "I know you are hurting. I hear your cries, but I am still good and worthy to be praised." I find is so amazing that in the midst of pain, we can always find a reason to praise Him, even if it's simply because of who He is. My pain is not gone, but I take great comfort in knowing that my god is THE God.

As He tenderly ministered to my soul, and as the evening commenced, He opened my eyes to a new revelation. At one point Chondra told a story about a time when she began to act self-righteous..about the burden of having such a crazy schedule, but God needed her to minister to these people..thinking no one else was fit. To which her wise older brother replied "who do you think you are? God doesn't need you, He can find someone else to minister to His people, He doesn't need you, He chose you."

Wow. In reflecting on my current situation with school and with the baby, I realized something very important. And, maybe it's to help get me through til the next month rolls around. But, God doesn't need me to minister to my class, He could have given the opportunity to someone else, but instead He chose me.  Maybe I am not pregnant right now because He knows that I would lose focus of the amazing ministry opportunity I have right in front of my face.  Wow.
In closing this lenghty self-evaluation, I hope that you are reflective today. There may be rough times, and you may feel like you have the world on your shoulders, but just remember that God has chosen you to be His hands and feet right where you are and that is an amazing gift.  And, I can't think of a better way to thank Him than by blessing His mighty, powerful name.

Blessed be His name indeed.